Just over two years ago, I published my first article here at EpicPew, 10 Facts about Angels That Will Blow Your Mind. While I was reflecting on the past two years of writing for EpicPew, a wave of nostalgia inspire me to revisit the subject of angels and how mind-blowingly awesome they are. Here’s some more angel fact to feed your love of angelology.
1. Angels Are Fascinating
My first article on angels went viral. Why? As much I would to say it was the quality of my writing, I can only point to the subject matter. People don’t know a lot about angels, and facts about angels are like potato chips. You can’t just have one. We can never know all there is to know about angels, but we can know enough to keep us thirsting for more. That is why so many people read my first ever article on EpicPew. ANGELS. ARE. FASCINATING.
2. There Are No Experts in Angelology
Sorry, folks! Saint Thomas Aquinas (the angelic doctor), Saint Bonaventure, and other theologians over the years have known a lot about angels, but not a single one of them constitutes an expert in the field. Your friendly neighborhood blogger is also not an expert in angels. These creatures are so complex and unable to be fully examined that it is impossible to become an expert in angels. Only God and other angels are experts in angelology which is sadly why one cannot get a degree in angelology.
3. One Does Not Become an Angel After Death
One of Hollywood’s great heresies is the idea that we become angel after we die. No. We. Don’t. I mentioned this in my first post about angels, but it needs repeating because people keep repeating, “Heaven gained another angel,” when a loved one dies. I’m saying it here because it is uncharitable to comment, “STOP IT. You’re being ridiculous,” on one of those Facebook posts. Angels are angels. People are people. That’s never going to change.
4. Angels Exist Outside of Time and Space
One of the points of contention in the comments section of my first article on angels was the idea of a guardian angel being assigned to one person and to one person alone. The reason I believe some people did not agree with that statement is my failure to drive home the fact that angels are not subject to time and space. They have no matter. Therefore, they do not have to play by the same laws of physics we do. What this means is your guardian did not wait for you to be born and will not be recycled after you die. This also means they can look upon the face of God at the same time they are saving your butt from harm without bilocating.
This does not mean, however, angels are omnipotent. Angels only know what God allows them to know. They do not know what you are thinking or what you are about to do. This is why it is imperative that you speak to your angel at least once per day.
5. Your Guardian Angel Is Not Your Pet
Your guardian angel is your guardian. He is there to protect you whether you want his help or not. However, you are not his boss. You have no authority over him. He is there to do the Lord’s will, not yours.
6. Demons Are Fallen Angels
It seems incomprehensible that an angelic being who was in the presence of God and created to serve Him could refuse to do His will. Yet, there are angelic beings who did just that (one-third of the angels if certain interpretations of Revelation 12:4 are correct). At the moment of their creation they were tested by God and chose to disobey rather than to serve the will of God.
I do not like to discuss demons much. Too much fascination with them can lead to dangerous consequences. When I discuss angels (or blog about them), I focus on the good angels without denying the existence of or downplaying the dangers of demons. There five things you need to know about demons: 1.) They exist. 2.) They will try to tempt you. 3.) They have no power over you, unless you let them have power over you (So, it’s a good idea to NOT let them exercise influence over you). 4.) Exorcisms are  real and sometimes necessary. 5.) God wins in the end.
More information about demons and exorcisms can be found on the USCCB’s FAQ page about exorcisms and on Peritus of religious demonology and exorcism Adam Blai’s website. There is also a book by exorcist Father Gabriele Amorth available from Sophia Press.
7. Angels Are Frightening, not fun
When angels appear in the Bible, they almost always tell the person to whom they appear, “Do not be afraid.” This is why most depictions of angels are theologically inaccurate. Most artistic renderings of angels present feminine looking angels which is completely inaccurate (see below). Angels should be muscular. After all, they do engage in combat with demons. To paint or sculpt angels as warriors is the ideal scenario. The statue of Saint Michael above is a great example of how these beings should be depicted.
SIDE NOTE: The depiction of cherubim (the second choir of angels) as babies is dumb, but not entirely theologically inaccurate. In the Middle Ages, artists used the innocence of infants to represent the innocence of cherubim. Hollywood, greeting card companies, and others who are ignorant of this fact have taken this depiction and run wild with it, to the detriment of the respect due to angels.
8. Angels Are Not Males, but They Are Masculine
Angels have no bodies and, therefore, no genitalia or sex chromosomes. They are genderless beings. However, they are masculine. This is not a politically correct statement, but it is the consensus of theologians is that angels are a reflection of God. Because God is a masculine being, the angels are as well. The proper pronouns for a angels are he/him.
9. There are Bazillions of Angels
The word “bazillion” was used deliberately above. There is a large number of angels. We will never know exactly how many there are, nor will we ever be able to count that high. There is one guardian angel for every human being that has ever existed or will ever exist. Most guardian angels come from the ninth choir of angels, and it is entirely possible that the other eight choirs of angels have just as many or more angels in their ranks. In short, you would not want to be in charge of an angel census.
10. Dr. Peter Kreeft Says Angels Have Senses of Humor
In his book Angels (and Demons): What Do We Really Know About Them?, Doctor Peter Kreeft theorizes that angels have senses of humor for two reasons. First, God has a sense of humor, For proof of that, Kreeft invites you to visit a zoo. Second, “[t]he essence of humor is intellectual.” Angels are more intelligent than humans. Therefore, they are probably laughing more often than we are.
Shout Out to Dr. Kreeft
Most of the information above came from his book on angels. Check it out on Amazon or wherever awesome books are sold.