Do the Saints get the attention they deserve? They led incredible lives. Below are seven of the most epic stories to be found in the lives of the Saints.
1. Saint Moses the Black, Reppin’ da Thug Lyfe
Moses the Black was a gang leader in the 4th century. He and his gang spread terror throughout the Nile Valley. One day while on the run from the authorities, he took shelter with some monks in the desert. After observing their lifestyle, he converted to Christianity and became a monk himself.
One day, Moses was in his cell and was attacked by a group of robbers. He defended himself, and single handedly subdued the men. Then, he drug them into the chapel where the other monks were praying. Stating he did not believe it to be Christian to beat the snot out of them, he asked the monks what he should do with them. The robbers were overwhelmed and converted to Christianity.
2. Saint Denis, Does Not Let Decapitation Stop Him from Spreading the Gospel
Saint Denis was bishop of Paris during the 3rd century. Not much is known about him, but he is often depicted holding his own head.
Saint Denis was martyred by decapitation. Stories say that after his head was severed he stood up and picked up his head. He then walked six miles while preaching a sermon of repentance.
Preach the Gospel at all times. If necessary, use your severed head.
3. Santa Claus, Punches a Heretic
At the Council of Nicea, Arius was vehemently explaining why he believed that Jesus the Son was not equal to God the Father. Bishop Nicholas became so enraged with the heresy that he approached Arius and hit him in the face.
As punishment, Nicholas was stripped of his Bishop’s garments and thrown into jail to wait for the end of the council when his punishment would be decided. During the night, he prayed for forgiveness and was visited by Jesus and Mary. When asked why he was in jail, he responded, “Because of my love for you.” Jesus gave him the book of the Gospels and Bishop’s robes. In the morning, Nicholas was discovered wearing his robes and studying the Gospel. He was reinstated as Bishop almost immediately.
4. Saint John Cantius, Gets Mugged
Saint John Cantius made many pilgrimages on foot. On one such pilgrimage, he was stopped by a gang of thieves, who stole all of his money and valuables. Before they left, they threatened him and demanded to know if he had any more money. He told them he did not, and they left. He soon remembered he had some gold coins sewn into his clothing, and ran after the thieves to give them the coins. The gang was so amused by this that they returned to him all that they had taken from him. That’s just crazy – crazy, buy Saintly.
5. The Earliest Report About the Loch Ness Monster Comes from the Life of Saint Columba
The Vita Columbae is the source for most of what we know about the life of Saint Columba. This biography was written by Adomnán, the ninth abbot of Iona (a monastic community founded by Columba), a hundred years following the death of Columba.
In Book Two of the Vita, Adomnán tells of an incident that occurred on the shores of Loch Ness. The story goes that Columba came across a group of Picts burying a man who had been killed by the creature. As “Nessie” began to set his sights on another swimmer in the water, Columba made the Sign of the Cross and said, “Thou shalt go no further, nor touch the man; go back with all speed.” The beast fled, and the native Scottish people were amazed.
It is important to mention that this event has no evidence to support its historical authenticity. Something similar may have happened, but it almost certainly did not involve the Loch Ness Monster. Nevertheless, it is an amusing tale.
6. Saint Scholastica, Starts a Storm
Saint Scholastica was the twin sister of Saint Benedict. Like her brother, she founded a religious community. Once a year, she would travel to a house near his monastery for them to talk and have spiritual conferences. On one of these visits, Scholastica begged Benedict to stay the night. He refused, not wanting to spend the night outside of his monastery. She began praying for him to stay, and a thunderstorm broke out that prevented Benedict from leaving. After conversing all night, Benedict returned to the monastery, leaving his sister for the last time. Saint Scholastica died three days later.
7. Blessed Miguel Pro, A Master of Disguise
Blessed Miguel Pro was a Jesuit priest who was forced to covertly exercise his priestly duties, due to the persecution of Catholics in Mexico in the early 20th century. He was a master of disguise and often walked into police stations dressed as a policeman to deliver the Eucharist to prisoners, despite the fact that warrants for his arrest had been issued. One time he was in a house celebrating Mass when the Mexican police surrounded the house. Luckily, he was able to sneak out at the last minute and go to a nearby house. Instead of hiding out at that house, he put on his police uniform and went back to the house to chew out the police there for not having arrested the priest. He then casually walked away while smoking a cigar. Miguel Pro was eventually captured and executed by firing squad. Just before he was shot, he shouted “¡Viva Cristo Rey! (Long Live Christ the King!).”