Alternative Uses For The New “Sex-Bots”—and we don’t even know why we have to say this…

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You may have heard the latest buzz about the so called “sex bots” that will be available to the public in the not-so-distant future. These robots are made to look extremely life-like, replacing the need for people to seek real human companionship, particularly sexual relationships.

In case you are wondering, the Catholic Church teaching forbids the use of these sex-bots and explains that their use is the same sin as masturbation. Because this topics is receiving increased public attention, the epicPew authors came up with alternative uses for robots and Artificial Intelligence.

Brings you coffee in bed in the morning

Android housekeeper

Diaper changer

Kids’ shoe finder

Answers the door when Jehovah’s Witnesses and Mormons come knocking

Hushes the loud parishioners standing in the foyer before mass begins

Does the finger snap when the kids are goofing off during Mass

Yells, “Get back in bed!” at the kids throughout the night

Runs errands for you

Brings you wine or beer at the end of the day

DOES YOR HOMEWORK

Reminds you to not be a bad person

Makes Redbull — and take it to you, with a smile, a huge smile!

Reads to you

Teaches you everything you need to know about Church teaching and history

Tuck you in at night

Tells you how awesome you are

Is a robo version of Catholic Answers Live

There’s got to be more but this point is this: robots are not for sex. Sacramental marriages are for sex. What is the world coming to?

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