You are down to the wire now! If you’re still looking for a great Christmas gift or two (or perhaps a late Hanukkah gift) for friends or family (or your priest), then EpicPew is here to save your procrastinating butt. So, here are the greatest — most EPIC — last minute gifts to give to your loved ones on the feast of the Nativity of Jesus Christ.
Graven Images
Just Kidding (sort of). If you’ve got a friend without a nativity set / crèche of their own, remedy that this year. Unless, of course, they’d rather not worship a statuette of baby Jesus.
Booze
But don’t just go slinging any old hooch. No, Christmas time calls for Christian booze!
Caramel(ites)
Perhaps booze is inappropriate for your intended recipient. Maybe instead of supporting the Christian Brothers, you can give your loved one some tasty (and I mean TASTY) handmade caramels from the ladies of Our Lady of the Mississippi Abbey. Alright, they’re Trappist nuns, not Carmelites. But this stuff will blow your mind.
Weaponry
If all that idolatry, drunkenness, and gluttony have got you down, maybe you should look for a good weapon — weapon of prayer, that is. Few things compare to the beauty of handcrafted rosaries!
Armor
And simply unwise to wield a weapon without appropriate armor, the kind of armor that keeps the wearer warm and makes those who see it ask, “What?!” You can tell the recipient it’s the Gospel in 3 Words — I came. I saw. I conquered.
Cash
No, not for the recipient…in the recipients name, given to one of the amazing Catholic ministries that build the Kingdom of God each and every day.
Jesus (in effigy)
Crucifixes are awesome! One for the car! One for the family room! One for the bedroom! Crucifixes everywhere! They even come in icon form!
Jesus (in the flesh)
Who said that Christmas gifts are only for the living? For your faithful departed, give them the most Epic of all gifts: Request a Mass for the special intention of your departed friend or relative. You can ask any priest.
BTW: Everything linked to here will put some or all of your funds into the hands of wonderful Catholic or Orthodox ministries. The icon is made by Orthodox monks in Wisconsin. The beers are brewed by Catholic monks in Massachusetts, New Mexico, and Belgium, respectively. And proceeds from the rosaries and hoodie benefit And Then There Were None and St. Paul Street Evangelization.
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