15 Reasons to Never Attend Franciscan University of Steubenville – EpicPew

15 Reasons to Never Attend Franciscan University of Steubenville

With all the great Catholic schools available, why would you EVER choose FUS? I mean, really.

 

1. All those households. Boring!

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I mean, seriously: who needs a family away from home? Lame.

 

2. There’s no social life whatsoever

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Can’t they invent something to do?

 

3. Nothing for young people to do either

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See? Do they even know what fun is?

 

4. Professors who know everything, literally

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It’s so freakin’ annoying to have teachers who know more theology than you.

 

5. Nicknames? Just stop.

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Tommy More? The Port? LC? The Millstone? It’s like a foreign language.

 

6. They talk about Eucharist SO. MUCH.

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Why on earth are these people obsessed with spending day and night with Our Lord?

 

7. Alumni collaborations are so annoying

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Have you seen how many alumni are working together on massive projects for the good of the Church? Way too much work.

 

8. Sr. M. Johanna Paruch. Amirite?

(no picture available cause there is no way to capture her awesomeness)

Don’t forget the M, don’t play the sax, and don’t make fun of Nova Scotia. Ever.

 

9. People pray pretty much ALL THE TIME

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Even on their bad days, even when everything in their life is going wrong, they still manage to smile when they see you and ask you how you’re doing. People have this solid joy that seems to never go away. If you don’t like happy people, it’s really annoying.

 

10. They’re definitely not involved in social justice

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You can’t even find them at the March For Life…

 

11. Architecture is totally boring

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so dull…

 

12. The lines for Confession are too long

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Unless you camp out in the chapel overnight, you’ll be waiting in line to go to Confession. It’s as if everyone is gunning for their chance to see One Direction first.

 

13. Studying abroad … yuck

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eew…

 

14. There’s no religious life at all

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15. Your mom won’t stop asking you if you’ve seen Scott Hahn.

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And even though you’ve already told her all the details about how you’ve beheld him at Mass on campus, out at a local restaurant, and even in the rigorous theology class you take with him, she’ll never stop asking.

20 thoughts on “15 Reasons to Never Attend Franciscan University of Steubenville”

  1. Shannon Marie Federoff

    #16… must put up with Tatiana Federoff’s epic humor. And you may have to carry her to the JC if she falls.

    1. Find a great pic of Gaming and I’ll replace it. I didn’t find any that really stuck out. Plus, plenty of students travel to PCJ – it’s just not part of the official FUS affiliation.

  2. Arvin Gallanosa

    The picture of # 13 (“Studying abroad …yuck.”) is the Pontifical College Josephinum … in Columbus, Ohio.

  3. I went to FUS before having to transfer (long story). It’s an amazing university! I took a philosophy class there that was, with no exaggeration, life-altering. Made me a better man.

    Sometimes the confession lines are long, but that’s inspiring :-D. Number #15 is very true, but not only from mothers..

  4. I used to volunteer in Lourdes in France, and I have met many great FUS kids there, unashamedly passionate Catholics all, who would rather help with the sick pilgrims during their school break in Austria than go to the beach. The pretty girls made me wish I were 40 years younger! ☺

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